Can’t seem to win or catch a break

Dear world,

Please explain to me why I cannot seem to do anything right.  I’m trying and everything I do never seems good enough.  A perfect example is taking pride in my work,thinking I’m doing a good job.  I had an interaction with the big boss and was pretty much told I’m no good at my job.  The problem I believe is twofold, I’m a female and I speak my mind.  I was told today to take the high road and go apologize.  I’m very sensitive and take ownership about my job.  When something goes wrong or someone is not happy, I tend to take it personally.  I thought caring was allowed but I seem to think only in certain areas.  And with Thanksgiving coming up, my family is coming out of the woodwork. I’m.    I’m not sure if they are sensingsomething or finally getting the hint that I’m done being there.  Life is still so confusing as I just understand why I can’t catch a break.  I was finally brave enough try an online dating website after being told to stop whining about being alone.    I look at people and wonder why I’m still alone.  I’m not skinny nor am I obese.  I see so many people with someone and again it makes me wonder what’s wrong with me.  This makes me contemplate suicide as I don’t think I belong here.  Im so longing for someone special in my life.  I’m so exhausted and fried from work, lack of sleep and too much pain.  I’m so depressed I’m at a loss as what to do cuz I don’t want to bother the ones thattruly are.  I still think if mydestiny is to be here on Earth, it is to a lonely ride all by myself.  I’m still trying to think positive and live life.  It continually gets to me and I do not want to be here.  What is my purpose for being alive?  Do I belong here?  What should I be doing?

Sincerely yours,

Forever trying

 

 

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One thought on “Can’t seem to win or catch a break

  1. I’m so sorry you feel this way 😦 I know what it’s like..just when I think I am doing everything in my power to do well at work and home,someone tells me I’m not and it makes me fall to pieces. Don’t let it get you down! And keep being the strong female voice that you are! One day when you least expect it that special person will walk into your life take care of you first!
    Feel better! Xo

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